Chad leaves tomorrow to go live in the dorm. When they’re babies, you surely don’t realize how quickly this day gets here, do you? I was looking through some old pictures last night and I was surprised by the number of pictures we have of Chad all dressed up. He liked to dress up even as a young boy but I never thought much about it. Now, when we go shopping, he’s only interested in looking at dress shirts and ties . . even though he doesn’t get to wear them very often.
I can remember each and every day that we took the pictures. Seems like just yesterday he was 2 or 4 or 8 or 12 and now he’s 21 and tomorrow he’ll be living in the dorm. My home will never be the same! Yes, he’ll be home on weekends, he’ll come home to visit but as he leaves tomorrow, a new era begins for Chad, as well as for Vince and me. Right now, I can’t say that I’m too happy about it . . in fact, there are big old crocodile tears streaming down my face as I try to type. I am not happy and my heart hurts!
He’s only going 50 miles away so it isn’t like it’s really far but . . well, a boy needs his mother, right? Don’t answer that!
Up until about a week ago, I was about 50/50 on this move. As each day passed, I got more apprehensive and closer to tears. I’m not ready! I thought I was. I truly didn’t think it would be so hard.
When I’m sad and wanting to cry, I’ll remind myself:
- I can turn my music up as loud as I want during the day.
- No one will complain that I’m sewing too early or quilting too late.
- I can use the bathroom downstairs instead of having to carry the dog (because he isn’t supposed to go up the stairs) upstairs to go to the bathroom; then carry the dog back down the stairs.
- I can cook anything I want without worrying that there might be something green in it.
- I can take a shower and be fairly sure I will have hot water.
- Vince’s truck can now be parked in the garage so it isn’t behind whichever car I want to use.
Somehow, nothing on that list is enough to get this lump out of my throat, or make my heart stop aching today. Tomorrow I will come downstairs and the basement will be empty. It won’t be easy. Many of you have been through this day and you know exactly how I feel.
He’ll be home Friday afternoon . . I’ll be very happy to see him! This will get easier . . won’t it??