I know chickens can be a lot of work.  We’ll use a chicken tractor — google that!   We’ll move it around and during the day, the chickens will be out in the fenced area eating those darned grubs that have caused the moles to ruin my yard!  If chickens don’t eat grubs, please don’t tell me.

We’ll till the poop up in a separate area and next year or the next, we’ll shovel that into our garden or flower beds.

Vince kept telling me that we couldn’t have chickens in town.  Then, my mailman, who would talk to me all day if I chose to stand out in the rain/snow/cold/heat . . whatever . . told me that I CAN have chickens in town.  I immediately came inside and read our city ordinances online and found that yes, I can have chickens.  Hens have to be at least 100 feet from my neighbors’ houses; roosters have to be 300 feet.

This next paragraph would bring Helen pleasure.  Too bad she can no longer read my blog!   I thought our pole barn was about 80 feet from our house.  Vince said it is about 150 feet from our house.  I thought anywhere we put our chickens, they would be about 250 feet from the neighbors so I had no intention of getting a rooster.  Vince said where we’re going to put them, the closest they’ll be to any neighbors is 400 feet so I can have a rooster but I think I won’t.  Between Vince, Chad and Speck, I really have enough of the men type in my life.

I think I confused some with my post about wanting a farm.  We’re going to go ahead and get the chickens in about 3 weeks.  If we should sell the house, the chickens are easily moved.  Worst case scenario is we get the chickens and decide that’s not what we want.  Typically, I’m not a quitter but everyone I know seems to be wanting chickens right now so I’m sure I could find a good home for them.

For years and years, I’ve begged for chickens and Vince just gave me that look! Wives . . you know the look . . it means he won’t even consider it.  Did I ever tell you how long it took for him to agree to letting me have a dog in the house?  I just kept my mouth shut about getting a dog . . kinda . . till Vince agreed that I could have a dachshund.  And now he loves Speck as much as I do!  So, from time to time I mentioned how much I wanted chickens.  Then when we moved here I was able to buy fresh eggs from a local quilter and the Amish and Vince decided having chickens was a good idea.  Now he’s as excited about getting them as I am.

And now . . about that elephant!   Nope . . no elephants for us, even if the city ordinances say I can have it.  Poor Helen!

For those of you who think I might be overreacting just a bit to the emails I have been receiving lately . . here’s one I just got.  My first thought was that it aggravated me a bit.  My second thought is that I feel sorry for this poor woman.

It’s obvious that you know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING when it comes to chickens!!!!

A hen will lay one egg per day – even if it lives in a nice lime green house with purple trim.

There is a rooster – the male of the species.  He likes to be on a high fence, crowing – announcing daybreak.  The neighbours would enjoy this.

What goes in a chicken comes out the other end – kind of juicy.  If you don’t want this all over your back yard, a fence will have to be created to enclose the ‘cute things’.

Flies just love chicken poop – be prepared for an invasion of flies.

A hen just doesn’t come to your back door and deposit her egg each day.  She has to have a nest in the chicken coop – check Google for chicken coop.  Straw is used to cushion the egg being dropped from the hind end of the chicken.  (Cracked eggs harbor salmonella.)  Sometimes the hen will poop on her deposit – so the straw makes it easier to clean.

At night, chickens like to sleep on roosts – check Google for that.

While they are in their coop, they will poop – dirty creatures!  Since it is juicy, you’ll have to put straw on the floor of the coop.  Eventually, it will get kind of ‘high’ with smell, so you’ll have to clean the coop.  This means making a trip to the store for a pitch fork – check Google for that.  You will have to load the straw and poop in the back of the husband’s truck and haul it somewhere – most landfills won’t accept agricultural wastes.

After this, the box of the truck will have to be washed – it will smell.

Oh yes, the chicken coop will have to be large enough so that you can get in there to gather eggs and to shovel poop.

Finally – most towns have a bylaw – check Google for that – where livestock - pigs, cows, elephants and chickens – are not allowed in town limits.

Stick to quilting – something you know about!!!

I guess I should be happy that she at least gives me credit for knowing something about quilting because otherwise, she doesn’t appear to think I have the sense to come in out of the rain!

Anyone else . . got something you want to say . . give me your best shot!  I’m ready for you!   Whew . . good thing tonight is Friday night because I think Helen has driven me to drinking!