I’m usually very focused but not so much the last few days. I don’t like this feeling. It’s kinda like myself is a few steps ahead of me and I keep trying to catch her and I can’t quite get back inside my own skin and get myself back in sync. What do you think I should do? Another vacation? A trip to Louisiana?
When I got up this morning, I decided to do some serious cleaning. That should have been my first clue that whatever has hold of me is serious and I need help quickly! I’m a terrible housekeeper. I can sweep and mop and vacuum around rugs forever but this morning, I picked up every rug in this house (upstairs only), swept, mopped, vacuumed, put the rugs back; vacuumed the stairs which I hate to do; cleaned out both fridges . . that’s a lot of housework for someone like me who avoids it as much as possible.
I went downstairs this afternoon and sat down at my sewing machine and never did sew. I stared at the wall; I stared at the sewing machine; finally gave up and turned off the machine.
Could it be spring fever? Maybe. After being in Arkansas last week and seeing so much rural rea, my heart yearns to live out in the country. I’m not even sure that living in the country is what I really want to do . . I think I just want to go back to the days I remember as a child visiting my grandparents’ farm. I want to plant but it’s too early for most of the things I want to plant; most anything that blooms has to be planted in containers on the deck because of the deer. Vince had some lumber delivered and I asked what that’s for . . chicken coop! Hmm . . I’m a bit confused about the chickens.
Maybe it’s that we had the whole week with Chad and even though it wasn’t hard when he left to go back to school yesterday, I miss him more than normal since we were together for 9 days.
On the other hand, maybe it’s because we were all together for 9 days and I need some amount of solitude. Even though Chad and Vince were fishing, they were in and out of the cabin often except the one day they had a guide.
Whatever . . I hope I’m back to feeling like my old self soon!