Where Did I Go Wrong?

If your children are considerate, sharing, selfless, appreciative . . don’t tell me about it.  Don’t even talk to me.  Seriously, I know Chad is a good kid, probably most of the selfishness is a product of his raising.  An only child, you know!

I’ve found some land that I really want.  I think I want every piece of land I find that has more than 10 acres.  I want it much more than Vince wants it.  What’s wrong with that guy?  Just because he pays the bills, has to keep up the house and land, has to worry about whether we could sell this house .  . I do understand all that but I still want the land.


This is the only thing working in my favor.  The house is . . well, CJ put it best.  “It’s dozable” as in a bull dozer can take care of it in short order.

I think Vince sees it all as a money pit; Chad sees it as duck hunting heaven.

Here’s a conversation Chad and I had today.  Don’t forget we’ve just paid tuition, room and board and books.  A big chunk of change!

Chad:  What did you decide?
Me:  Nothing yet.  Cindy mentioned that once we get our house built, we could maybe renovate the old house and use it for quilt retreats.
Chad:  Oh, I’m pretty good at sheetrock work and I can lay tile (like I believe that!).
Then he said:  I’m not saying I would do it for free.  There would be a price involved if you want my help!
Me:  What the heck?  You wouldn’t just help us fix it up for free?
Chad:  No!  What do you think.  And, I think during hunting season, you should rent it out as a hunting camp.
Me:  A hunting camp?  With my longarm and all my stash in there . . a hunting camp?
Chad:  Oh, mom . . I think I may end up with a 4.0 this semester.  A 3.8 at the very worst!
Me:  Chad . . you’ve been to school 2 days.  You say this at the beginning of every semester.  I hope you do end up with a 4.0.  You can but you have to study.
Chad:  Yep, that’s my goal.

So, in one conversation, he tells me:

  • He will help me but I have to pay him
  • My beloved quilt studio will be a hunting camp during hunting season
  • He’s going to have a 4.0 this semester

Vince thinks I have no grasp of reality!  Maybe Chad is more like me than I thought!  🙂sig


  1. 1

    Linda says

    Maybe you could bribe Chad into helping you by promising to stock that pond with some really nice fish. Fishing nut that he is he might go for it!!! LOL

  2. 2


    Judy, your stories always make me LOL 😛 If my son told me what Chad told you, then I’d have to tell him that if I have to pay for help then I’ll be hiring PROFESIONAL people… b/c you just know that if he has to rent a wet saw – you will be the one ending up paying to rent it… and I’d rather spend my money on someone who REALLY knows how to do it and do it right.

    the photo of the land is beautiful… and would be perfect for a big lodge for quilt retreats in the spring perhaps and then lease it out for duck season? I know. I know – don’t shoot me… LOL 😉 but if it’s a money making opportunity I’d say go for it! 😉 after all you have lots of land to do so 😉

    Love from Texas! ~bonnie

    • 2.1


      There you go, Bingo-Bonnie gave you the perfect answer… pitch it to Vince as an investment property, set up for quilting retreats… your private residence is just an added perk!

      I’d come take your quilting classes, especially on that pond! 🙂

  3. 4

    Marilyn says


    Your post’s are so down to earth…..I love reading them. That picture is
    beautiful….good luck trying to talk Vince, into it.

  4. 5

    Cindy says

    Oh, you tell Chad that I don’t THINK SO! Besides, ducks don’t just magically light on your pond. You gotta do … something first, I’m not sure what, but something.

    No duck hunting. Quilting. And that’s it.

  5. 6

    Cindy says

    Isn’t it weird that now we’re talking about duck hunting and you’ve suddenly got ads for hunting leases and stuff?

    They must think you’re terribly schizophrenic.

  6. 7


    Your view is wonderful………I could see myself living with that view………

    On the days your paying Chad………maybe you should charge him fees for rent and meals on the days he’s working. Lets see first class hotel for one night $150 (breakfast free for that rate) plus lunch and dinner….that should be worth $50……that’s alot of hours he would have to put in just to cover those items. It’s nice to know that most children are the same………gotta keep shakin’ that money tree.


  7. 8


    Oh Judy! That spot looks like the ideal place for the longarm quilters’ retirement home! No hunters allowed. You let me know when you’re having the first retreat and I’ll be there. What a beautiful place. I can no longer hoist drywall into place, but I can affix it to the wall and tape and spackle it in there. I got experience doing my studio!

  8. 9

    Julie H. says

    What a gorgeous piece of “God’s Country.” Do your research checking on things like property taxes, zoning, and building codes (check out the neighbors too). I’m all for acreage if it pencils out.

    I’d come to the quilter’s retreat.

  9. 10

    dawn says

    kids are all the same. you think they would appreciate what you do for them but nope. You gotta do more and pay for everything. My son told us he is upset that my hubby and I rent as we wont “leave him a house”. I said to him what about saving up and buying your own? you know like bringing lunch to work like we do and not spending 30-40 a week just on lunch. go figure. AND he is NOT an only child. I think it is the generation of what can you do for ME.
    Dawn in MA

  10. 11

    Susan says

    I’m a special education teacher. I’d give my eye teeth for all my students to have a conversation close to this one with their parents. I have two brothers (I’m sixty) that learned to do sheet rock and tile by just doing it. Chad sounds like a dream and I hope you get your dream land.

  11. 12

    pdudgeon says

    LOL, tell Chad it’s sweat equity all the way, and that he is investing in his future, but you’ll pay him in farm fresh eggs.

    the land looks beautiful.

  12. 13


    hahahaha…….tell Chad if he charges you for work, you’ll hand him a bill for his “lodging and meals” during breaks from school since your obligation to feed and house him ended when he became of “legal age”. LOL Seriously, that land looks fabulous and what a place for a retreat. IF you put the long arm and stash in a room that could be locked up during hunting season, I guess you could do both…quilting retreats and duck hunting retreats. BUT….I tend to think like you……NO hunting retreats.

  13. 14


    I’ll take it!

    Oh wait, I don’t have any money.

    And it would be stealing from YOU.

    My eldest leaves for college tomorrow and she’s mad that we won’t pay for her cell phone bill. Argh.

  14. 15


    What a beautiful view. I can see myself sitting on a wide front porch with a cup of coffee in the mornings listening to the birds – before the quilting starts. Good luck.

  15. 16

    Pat B says

    There is a certain “arrogance of youth” that many young people go through. I know my two young adult sons are still in that stage. They will do everything right and not make the mistakes of other generations and generally be much wiser. Then sometime reality will hit and they will realize that the world does not revolve only around them.

    Beautiful piece of land.

  16. 18


    Bonk Chad on the head for me and tell him he should be honored to help you build your dream… just like you’ve helped him build his!

    Saying that, I wish my boys were as nice as Chad, you’ve turned out a great kid there!